Saturday, August 16, 2008

It is time for another vacation to Crazy Town

So since WLS, my emotions have been on a roller coaster ride. If you are a regular reader of this blog, this is not new news. Well, the big drop of the track is here again. And I need some perspective. Here is what happened:

I chatted with my boy on line yesterday for like ten minutes over lunch break, then I asked if he was going to be around after I get off work, cause I needed to talk to him about a couple of things. He said sure, I'll be sure to take my phone in case I am running errands. So I call him after work and he says he is in the middle of something, he will call me back in about 45 minutes. So TWO HOURS later, still no call. SO I call him, he says he is still busy whats up. I ask him one quick question and tell him to call me back later when he has time to talk. HE NEVER CALLED. I am so mad/hurt. Living so far apart is really hard, and having very regular conversations is all that i have to keep me going. I dreamt about him and crazy crap all night because i was so upset when I finally went to sleep. I woke up early this morning and it is all I can think about. I will call him later and talk to him about this, but it is still too early there due to the time difference.

Am I over-reacting? Is this my hormonal carnival ride taking over my common sense or is this a mis-step on his part? I normally don't get angry at him, even for things I should. But I am PISSED off!

Not being able to trust my own judgement is very frustrating, and honestly it is scary. I don't want to be crazy or unstable.


Meghan said...

Hmmm... that's weird. If there was something that would take a long time or was very important, he could have just told you what it was so that you'd know what's up!

Honestly, I wouldn't call him today. Wait for him to call you.

Amber said...

Sounds to me like maybe you need to do some soul searching and figure out what is best for you and what is going to make you happy. Obviously you love your guy but you're not happy and that's not healthy. Maybe you need a break to figure out what you really want, maybe that's what he wants too but doesn't want to say it. I know he has a lot on his plate with his mom but just remember things happen for a reason. You have to make yourself Happy. Thinking of you!

denise said...

Here's my two cents. It would have taken 2 seconds to say, hey, this is what is going on, i can't talk, i'll call you. That would have alleviated your emotions, etc. He has alot going on, but he's being an ass. I wouldn't call him either. And your statment about not being able to trust yourself really bothered me. Don't let anyone make you doubt yourself. You should always trust your inner voice. All this drama is not worth it. You don't seem like the type that wants all this drama in your life. I say take a break, take time to catch your breath and find someone that is there for you and is willing to put you first and make your feelings a priority. And just out of curiosity, does he read this blog?

denise said...

Are you MIA? Hope you are ok.

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