So I graduated from grad school. But that doesn't tell you the whole story. I was a bit of a late bloomer education wise. I dropped out of undergrad when I was 20 and didn't go back until I was 25. I had a bit of a personal tragedy and I decided that life was too short for regrets and I moved back in with my lovely parents and dove head first into school. In two and a half years, I got my 4 year degree. Then since I already have the momentum, I decided to go on to grad school. So here I am 4.5 years later and I am done. I have a job lined up that I start on July 1. but for some reason I feel so weird. I wake up every morning nervous as all hell. These butterflies are worse than my pre-surgery butterflies.
Maybe it is the combination of the new job and the new body that is leaving me uneasy. I should be happy, but instead I am worried. I wish my boy was here full time. He always knows how to calm me down.
Maybe my nerves are on edge because I am scared shitless of my new job. Not exactly the job itself, but mostly the living situation. I am moving to a small town in Iowa of only 30,000 people and 1 hour from any other towns with more than a few thousand people. And I know no one. I am not a solitary person. I like others to be around. I have a great roommate and she is moving to London, my boy is in Arizona and my family is a five hour drive in St Louis. I don't want to be the lonely cat lady. I want friends and I want my boy here. I am sad today. I am scared today.